22 May 2009

ado annie

Thank you all for sharing your experiences. What generous friends I have in bloggerville who are willing to share these very experiences for the greater good.

The nice thing about believing that there is a plan for my life, is the fact that I also believe that can't mess things up. I can't. There is no decision that I make that will be outside of that plan. That doesn't mean I'm a little robot. Predestination and free will are not mutually exclusive.

Okay, let's say that I plan for my students to have an extra recess on Friday afternoon. There is, actually, some math that we could finish up instead, but I've planned for recess. I ask the class if they would rather finish up math or go outside. If they say they'd like to finish math, we will finish math. But, they say they'd like to go outside and we have recess as I planned. They didn't know this was the plan, but they chose it.

That's a very poor illustration of how I think free will and predestination work.

(Boy, am I getting preachy these days. Pretty pictures tomorrow.)

So, no matter what I say, it will all come out right. My decision is already planned.

But, since I've asked over and over not to have to say "no" to a child (even though a little part of me still thinks I might have to...) I am going to be Ado Annie, that infamous I'm just a girl who cain't say no girl. Except I can. I can say no. I just won't.

Just because I was surprised, doesn't mean I'm going to say no. I'm ready to meet these girls! And, the nice thing about me is that my little dilemmas generally sort themselves out quickly. I was surprised, but not doubting.

Remember the last possible? She was seven. And, I never quite warmed to her. But, I kept going. (Really, there are very, very few children that I don't eventually understand and love. And those few had...parental handicaps.) And, because of the first possible, I started corresponding with a family who had their own possible from the same pen-pal situation. The MOE voiced my same concern about my possible and didn't invite me to meet her. The family turned down their possible. And now I have a friend who is interested in pursuing the other family's declined referral. A family could be united...partly because I didn't say no. (Okay, I almost called this post "ripples" ala Joan of Arcadia--a show everyone should watch. )

So I'm waiting to hear if I get to meet these girls. If it's a go I have SHOPPING to do! Shame, huh? ;>

Yes, my brain is in practical mode.

  • I need to find out if it's required for the girls to have their own beds or if they can share.
  • I will need more clothes in bigger sizes. Smaller sizes can be donated to the local orphanages, given to my favorite caretaker at Lapouhinka for her granddaughter and sold on eBay.
  • I need a bigger pair of sunglasses for big sis.
  • I need more sticker books and introductory activities in an older age range.
  • I need to know when their birthdays are so that I know how to increase the age range in both my homestudies. (One sw has been contacted and the other is on holiday until next week.)
  • I will be teaching internationally longer, most likely, to provide for two girls. I should get my masters...but that will continue to be put off.
  • I looked at the database and found a sibling possibility for these ages. If it's them, and they're so precious that I can't let myself think it IS them, then they have lovely names and I know what middle names I'll add.
So I guess I better get busy.

It's possible we'll hear about the possibles later today...


Rachael said...

Uh-oh, she's looked at the data base... ;>

Debbie said...

This is so exciting!! And yes, you CANNOT mess up GOD'S PLAN!!

Tami said...

Oh Kate! I am SO very excited for your possibilities. You are absolutely right, all of this is in God's hands and he knows the choice you will make. None of it will be a surprise to Him. What a comfort, huh?! :)
You know of our 'surprise' in Maddie. We went to Ukraine looking for a health 18-36 month old and came home with an awesome special needs 46 month old. I wouldn't trade her for anything.
God definitely knows what he's doing!
Let me know if there is some way I can send you some things for the girls. Remember...I have girls the same age...I can help! :)

votemom said...

dibs on any of the size 4's to 6's that are too small ;o)

Lindsay said...

It sounds like whatever concerns you had about the ages is long gone :)

Hope they don't keep you hanging on over the weekend before giving you some more information.

Thinking of you.

Tina in CT said...

The girls might be smaller and one might still fit in one of the sizes that you bought.

Here's hoping you have an answer soon.

Why would you have to work internationally longer? Does it pay better?

The Holmes Crew said...

I'm so happy for you! Can't wait to hear more!

Annie said...

Well....you are having fun (once you start looking on the database...well!)

Watch out about those sizes though. Sergei was just reminding me that he is now wearing some clothing I bought for him when we adopted him. Those poor little people are smaller than we think. Anastasia (at age 11) is still wearing 8's and an occasional 6. So, your 4's might still work out!

I'm so excited for you; gosh it is fun to live vicariously, too!

Suz said...

Kate, I'm just now seeing this!! All this!! I've been computer free for a few days.

Praying here in Texas! Of course the day is way over there, so hopefully you'll post tomorrow if you know something new.

Carrie said...

Your last two posts have my eyes so watery, I can't see. Hoping and praying for you.

Maggie said...

You know, when I first started out in adoption, I had full intentions of adopting a baby girl. I researched it, I agonized over the pros and cons, I checked out childcare costs, I thought about every little detail.

Then the opportunity to host a kiddo from Russia presented itself (still think God had a hand in that one). Within a week, I dumped my years of analyzing and research and switched from a baby girl to and 8 year old boy.

And it was right. It was what was meant for me even though I didn't know it.

Your heart can make the leap from what was planned to what is right very quickly. If this possibility is the right one, your heart will make that leap.

Katie said...

C-rap! I turn my head for one second to deal with life and you get possible POSSIBLES!?? I feel all...ashamed...like I have let you down by not knowing (I am sure this made it all worse for you. How narcissistic can I possibly get???). Waiting to hear more...and pls remember, John came home a 3. 5 year old BOY. He was supposed to be an under 2 yr old GIRL. Supposed to's are not all that...I can't imagine it any other way!

Jenni said...

I'm waiting on pins and needles to hear more!

Jim said...

Feeling all full of anticipation and happy-ness for you.

But if they ask you to travel, it's not quite the big production it is for most of us coming from America, is it? But the excitement and nerves are likely just the same. :)

Kay B said...

I have prayed for you Peace and Wisdom, both of which God gives abundantly.

We thought we would adopt 3-5 years old, Darya was 9 when we brought her home.

God will place the right child(ren) in you home, so you got it right in knowing that you can't mess that up!

Kathy Friend said...

God's plan is the only plan I want any part of...even if I don't get it, don't like it, and "in the moment" want to change it.

Our plan was to adopt a 2 year old...5 years ago. That was the plan, that was how I shopped (spending a LOT of moola on really adorable clothes and shoes), that is how I decorated her room, there was even a "toddler" shower where friends gave us gifts for a 2-4 year old.

That wasn't God's Plan...but that's OK. God's plan was to keep her in Russia until she was 7. I don't know why, and may never see the big picture.

For those of us who have been in this adoption game a long time HAVE to be OK with that - with His plan.

I am so excited for you - and I am so inspired by your willingness to embrace His next step in the process!

Ktates said...

oooohhhh...now I am getting excited for you! Can I let myself get excited for you??