25 January 2009

have hoop? will jump

Friday I copied my dossier. (I was disappointed to find that all my reference letters weren't included--and even more disappointed when I asked my caseworker where they were and she replied, "Not sure why it is missing. Hope everything goes well. Good luck. R". I replied asking for a phone conference and referencing past e-mails that said at least two of the missing rec's had arrived in their office. Grr. ). My whole, notarized, apostilled dossier.


Well, I think it's because of a combination of things.

1. People in Russia don't often admit when they don't know something. They won't ask their supervisors because that would be admitting they don't know. So, they make up an answer--and often it's one that will be so time-consuming that the asker will not bother.

2. A good answer to an unknown question is "throw stamped paperwork at it". (This has the added benefit of being time consuming and will, perhaps, make the asker just go away.)

This is not just my experience. This is not just adoption experience. This is the shared experience of many, many people of many different nationalities.

They've decided I need to have a whole new hs done by a Russian sw. (Actually, new agency didn't even know that's what they were asking me to do. They kept asking me to get two letters. I kept telling them that meant I needed all my paperwork because the two letters WERE a new hs. Finally, and rather ungraciously, they understood and sent me my dossier.) I've copied the dossier and now I have to fill out a form so that a sw can review it. That's on Monday's agenda. I'm hoping it's an easy name-and-address form that I can do myself on the spot. It it's involved, I'll have to bring it to school for some help and return it on Tuesday with the paperwork.

I also have to get ppr commitments from the same Russian sw. Guess how often I'll have ppr visits? Every three months.

Yes, you're remembering correctly. I've flown in two international, licensed-in-the-US social workers to do this very same thing. TWO. And guess what. The latest hs will expire in February. I've got questions in to my agency asking if it needs to be updated or if this new hs will replace it for court.

So I'm jumping through hoops while trying not to rock the boat...or be lost in the crowd. Tricky. Thankfully, as a forum friend (and blog reader) pointed out, they haven't set the hoops on fire. Yet.

Anybody got any other hoops that need jumping through before I take off my tennies?


Tami said...

No hoops, here. Thankfully we're all done. But I want you to know I'll be on standby with the fire extinguisher our sw required for our last hs...just in case someone gets out their lighter! ;>)

Unknown said...

Yes. Russia just called, and they need to see apostilled documentation that you will never iron your clothing while wearing it again.

In triplicate, pls.

votemom said...

hoop-jumping is exhausting and drains the life out of you after a while.

you are very funny katie ;o)

Lisa said...

When I was doing foster care, I had home visits every 3 months too. It was pretty much a non-event. The sw came, I drank coffee or tea while she drank a glass of water (I think there must have been some stupid state rule about not accepting hospitality!) and we visited for 15 or 20 minutes while the kids ran in and out interrupting and that was that. Next thing you know, I get a copy of a 3 or 4 page document updating the status of my home!

Good luck on Monday. Hugs, Lisa

Andrea said...

I will throw no hoops, flames, or anything else in your direction, but I do send hugs! And if I should chance to find a magical elf who completes paperwork perfectly and in every imaginable language, to the satisfaction of every bureaucrat on the face of the planet, then I will certainly wrap him up and send him to you too.

But in the meantime I just send hugs.

Tina in CT said...

Is your road to motherhood so full of red tape and slow because you live outside the US? I wish I could wave a magic wand and place your D2B (s) on your doorstep.

Annie said...

You poor soul....but yes; that does sound like adoption, and like Russia. Russian adoption is so difficult. The only thing is, Ukraine sounds worse. Hard to imagine.

Matt and Carla Morgan said...

Ugh - bless your heart. I won't be adding any hoops to your obstacle course - just prayers that you get through this with remaining shards of sanity.


Lea said...

With all of the children who are in need of good homes, it is quite shameful that they cannot get their act together and get this done.

Hoping for no more hoops for you Kate. You have already had way more than your fair share.

Question for you Kate. What was that little rhyme you have about obeying the first time with a good attitude? It is past time that I teach it to the boys and I can't remember it now.

Thanks, Lea

Rachael said...

Just shaking my head over here.

Hope all goes well with the new form.

Anonymous said...

oy. seriously - I don't think i could do it... would lose it and start screaming at people. Or throw up my hands. Or - I don't know. But I do know that YOU are a superstar for all this hoop-jumping.